Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Some of my favorite things...



Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! K and I are still experiencing firsts. For the first time in 15 Christmases, we were home alone on Christmas day. The holiday season is always jammed packed for us trying to get to different families houses...well the night before my birthday I started with chills, fever, achyness, the works. So on my birthday (the 22nd) I went to the doctor to see what was going on. I felt horrible. And I had the flu. K came home that night feeling horrible as well, and ended up with the flu also. So for Christmas, we stayed home exchanged a few presents and watched movies all day. I think God was trying to tell us to slow down. I love my family and spending time with them, but I have to say that the change of pace was nice. We have since started feeling much better and celebrated my birthday and Christmas several times with different family members, but last week being able to slow down and just enjoy each other's company was very nice.




Do you remember Myspace? I used myspace a lot and liked being able to personalize my page. They used to have tons of favorite lists to fill out in the news feed. I loved those things.


My sister has two wonderful blogs: Beauty on a budget and The Finding Me Project. You should definitely check them out! After reading her latest blog on her favorite things, I thought it would be an interesting post for you to have some insight into who I am and some of my favorite things...





1. Favorite pet I ever had: The only pet I ever had was Patches, my mom's dog. I guess she is my favorite. She only loves me when K is around. She used to sleep with me though when I lived at home


2. Favorite car I've owned: K's Hyundai Elantra. Can't wait until we can trade my Nissan in and that car is mine :)


3. Favorite meal out, ever: When K proposed to me at an Italian Restaurant in town. It was so sweet and he was so nervous!


4. Favorite food I've cooked: I love to cook spaghetti and chili


5. Favorite food from childhood: My dad's nachos


6. Favorite drink on a hot summer day: Iced tea


7. Favorite drink on a cold winter night: Hot chocolate


8. Favorite conversation I've ever had with a person: I really don't have a favorite. But K is always funny to talk to


9. Favorite movie of all time: I don't have just one. The Notebook, The Princess Bride, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Underworld...names a few


10. Favorite book of all time: Again...can't pick just one. The Hunger Games (Suzanne Collins), Dead Until Dark (Charlaine Harris), the Harry Potter series (J.K.Rowling) just to name a few


11. Teacher who changed my life, and why: I had two very influential teachers. My 7th grade teacher, Mr. Abbott, helped me find my love for acting. He encouraged me to get involved in drama and to this day I wish I would have stuck with it. Also, I had the same English teacher for 8th, 11th, and 12th grade. She started teaching my 8th grade year and helped my love for English.


12. Professional mentor who changed my life, and why: Two people again. K is a very professional person and I admire his work ethics and how he started from the bottom at the bank and worked his way up. I am so proud of him. I also look up to my grandma for her professional leadership. She was a nurse for 25 years and knew that was what God wanted her to do. I admire her for the hard work and determination she displayed to achieve it


13. Favorite color: I have always loved purple since I was a kid


14. Favorite song: Love Like Crazy by Lee Brice and Chicken Fried by Zac Brown Band


15. The best paid entertainment I've ever seen: K will be so proud for this one. In 2004 I surprised him with tickets to see his fave band, Metallica. That was the best concert I have ever been to.


16. Favorite hobby activity that makes me get lost for hours: Scrapbooking


17. The most fun road trip I ever took... where and with whom: The last vacation K and I took to TN was amazing. We had so much fun...it was so relaxed and it is long overdue that we do that again.


18. My favorite flower - purchased: Fire and Ice Roses


19. The most treasured book in my library: My bible my grandma has given me


20. The most important tool in my craft/ hobby stuff: My Cricut


21. The coolest handmade gift I ever gave anyone: my photo calendars


22. The most healthy and vital time in my life was/is? For the past 2 years I have kept off almost 45 pounds


23. Song that makes me move no matter how bad I feel? Light Em Up by Fall Out Boy


24. My favorite patriotic experience? This was an experience I will never forget. K, my mom, and I went to San Antonio to see my brother graduate from the Dental Clinic at Fort Sam Houston. We went to church with him and seeing hundreds of soldiers dressed in their uniforms worshiping God...was a sight I will never forget.


25. My one favorite item of clothing? I am a big t-shirt person. I have a couple favorite t-shirts I love to wear


26. The one item I would take to the desert island? a cell phone


Friday, December 12, 2014

What works for us...

I teach 2 year old children at a church in a little program known as "Children's day out". Everyday I usually come home with a couple interesting stories to tell K. This week I got the idea for this post from them. Everyday we try to stick to a routine for them...kids thrive on routine. Before lunch we always take them outside and around the church for a walk to work off some of their energy. When we enter back into the classroom, they are supposed to sit on our little rug while we put out their lunches. Well, one day we wanted to do things differently. We wanted to practice a new song we were teaching them. So when we entered the class we told them to line up against the wall. They went straight to the rug and sat down. (Well, most of them. We have a few that run around...they are 2) It made us laugh at how one minor detail didn't compute to them. And it made me realize we are creatures of habit, but it works.

K and I have habits, rituals, and traditions that make our marriage great. Things we make it a point to do that mean a lot to us and make our marriage special. Please feel free to try some of these and tell me what your rituals or traditions are.

1) We eat supper together: This was very important to both of us. We started this very early in our marriage that we would sit at the table for supper time and eat together. Even if he works late, I will eat a snack and wait to eat supper with him. It gives us a chance to relax together and catch up on our day.

2) Bedtime: We try our hardest to go to bed at the same time. Very rarely we don't. I know this is hard for those who work different hours, but this is so important for a married couple. K and I have some of our best conversations before we go to bed. The intimacy of going to bed together is not only about the obvious reasons, but also about the connection shared.

3) We text each other during the day when we are a part: I will admit I had to work at this one with K. Sometimes he would get very busy at work and I wouldn't hear from him all day. After we talked about it, we text each other to say hi or to tell each other something every day. Texting makes it so easy to just let them know, hey, I am thinking about you and I love you. Even if they can't respond right away, they can when it's convenient. 

4) At supper time, we pray- Well anytime we sit down to eat together we pray together. We also are trying to get better about setting one night a week to do a bible study or devotional together.

5) Hugs and kisses- K is a very affectionate person. That is something that is important to him. So every evening when he gets home, he hugs me and gives me a kiss. We also do this before bedtime. It's amazing how that hug and kiss can make whatever kind of day I have had get better. I look forward to it everyday.

6) Date nights- We try to have a date night every week. With the craziness of the holiday season, it doesn't always happen, but we try very hard to spend an evening doing something we love together, even if it's just watching movies in our pj's.

Traditions...and New Traditions:

1) My Birthday: On my birthday for the last few years, we have gone to the movies and ate at a restaurant together. I love this time we spend together. It's something we can do for a date, but the treat on my birthday makes it very special.

2) New Year's eve: I know you can understand how crazy the holidays get...so on New Year's eve, K and I try very hard to spend this night at home together alone. It doesn't happen every year, but we are pushing for it this year. Sometimes you need one holiday to yourselves to regroup and settle down after all the busyness.

3) Christmas presents: We are bringing something back this year. When K and I started dating, we had traditions of exchanging presents. When we got married, we started shopping together and just picked out what we wanted for Christmas and stopped exchanging. After talking to my co-workers about it, I realized how much I missed it. So we decided to set a limit and get a couple stocking stuffers to exchange on Christmas this year. I already have K's wrapped and in his stocking :)

I hope this gives you an insight into K and I's rituals and traditions. What are some traditions you do as a couple?  Try something new this Christmas season. That's what makes marriage fun!






Monday, December 1, 2014

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Well, hello! How was your Thanksgiving? This year my family did things a little different. For the past 6 years, K and I hosted thanksgiving. But this year has been busy...stressful and painful. So we asked the family to go to Golden Coral for lunch. And it was good and relaxed. K and I enjoyed it. After, we did our annual black Friday shopping...started at 6 and ended at 1 am! Yes...I did say we. K actually started the tradition when we were dating; he would shop for me. When we got married, i joined him. We get all our nieces and nephews Christmas presents and we love it. It's fun. I am very blessed that he doesn't mind doing this. It's a tradition we love together.
So let's talk about respect. K and I were at a friend's get together one day and the husbands were talking in one area and the wives in another. It wasn't long before one friend started talking about her husband, saying very belittling and degrading comments about things he didn't do. It was a domino effect before the wives joined in and started saying all the things their husbands didn't do. We can show our husbands respect in many ways and this my readers, is not one of them.
Our husbands (significant others) need our respect. It is one of their biggest needs as a man. They need to trust that when we are in the company of our friends and family that we will talk lovingly and respectfully about them. Even at times when you maybe upset. That brings a point about family...I think it is important to have a family member or friend you can go to for advice about your relationship if there is something you can't handle together. Or someone you can talk to that is objective to your love life. We all need someone we can trust to help us. Of course, the best person for this is Jesus. But, be careful how you "vent" about your loved one to family. They are the outsider and most of the time family won't forget what they did.

We can also show respect to our husbands by how we talk to them. Once when I was mad at K, I said something to him that was very mean. I can't remember now what it was...but I have never forgotten the look on his face. It was full of defeat and hurt. It hurt me that I put that look and I never wanted to do that again. I realized how much my words can tear him down and I don't want to do that. He deserves better from me. Now I know there are situations out there that you may say, but you don't know how much my husband disrespects me...how can I show him respect? I pray for you out there that are struggling. My advice is to try. Each day try doing something nice and tell him something nice. Keep doing this everyday. The next time you are around someone bashing their husband, don't join in. It's not an overnight fix, but I will pray that a change of attitude will help.
Lastly...praise your husband or loved one. Let them know how much you appreciate all they do. Our very important job as their wives is to build their ego. This is huge, my friends. Our husbands need to hear how proud we are of them and how much we appreciate what they do for us.

Monday, November 17, 2014

Book Review: Pulling back the Shades

I will start this off by saying I was naive. I am familiar with the popular series 50 Shades but I did not know what it contained. I really didn't have a desire to read it although a good friend and sister in laws have read it and raved about it. But they are also Twilight fans and I am not, so I overlooked the suggestion.

I say I was naive because I read books that are in the genre of romance. I love a good love story, but some of them had explicit content in them. A lot of argument and controversy centers around the 50 Shades series and books with explicit content known as "soft porn" or "mommy porn". The trouble with this is addressed in this book and opened my eyes to the harm of it not just for me, but for Christian wives.


Dr Juli Slattery (co-author) is a clinical psychologist and co-founder of a ministry focusing on intimacy for women. Dannah Gresh teamed up to write this book to expose the dangers of erotica and the phenomenon of what 50 Shades has become. What I was shocked to learn is Christian women and even teens are reading it. It may not be fair to base my opinion of this book on theirs but it gave me enough information to form my own. It doesn't feel like something I want to expose myself to.

They list reasons why women read books of this type. They (when I say them or they I am referring to the authors) talk of the contradiction of women's independence and feminism, yet this book is "spreading like wildfire" (20). A book about bondage! "No longer is it considered romantic or chivalrous for a man to open a door for his date or even to ask a woman out in the first place. Men have to be told "step aside-we can take care of ourselves!" (20). Yet, a series surrounded by bondage, submission, and torture for pleasure is a best selling book. I was appalled to find some of the things that was in this series like "red room of pain", BDSM (bondage, dominance, sadism, and masochism) are used. I have to admit that my naivety showed through because I did not know what BDSM was and this book answered that. I came to the conclusion I am not the type of person that would want physical pain and torture to achieve pleasure or gratification. I find it disgusting and degrading to what God has made "making love" to be. It pains me to know women are turning to this for whatever reason. Yes it is fiction and maybe read for fun, an escape from reality. I will admit that is why I love to read. I get lost in a book and escape. The harmful part of erotica and books like 50 Shades is it leaves a dissatisfied look at your marriage or love life. The authors tackle reasons why the books are read and other harmful reasons not to. Juli and Dannah state that "we have met with women who started reading erotica to awaken their sex lives with their husbands but it actually caused them to be less satisfied in their marriage bed than ever" (30)." 

The author of 50 Shades has even gone as far as stating in an interview "what I wanted to demonstrate is that I do not look at the world in terms of black and white...I think it's shades of grey (32). She wanted to test the boundaries of morality. That my dear readers, is scary for Christians.  Christians are reading this series and getting sucked in and blurring lines. God believes in black and white; his instruction manual is the bible for us. You want a good love story and a guide to romance? Read Song of Solomon (maybe I will do a bible study of it and blog about it? What you think?)

I think the authors said it best with this quote: "God designed sex as a powerful symbol and celebration of covenant love. It is a physical and emotional expression of the deepest commitment two people can make to each other. But sex is more than that. It represents the ultimate covenant love: God's love for his people (44).

Bottom line of this review...this book was an amazing eye opener to a very controversial topic. I had no intentions of reading the series and I definitely won't. I also will be a lot more careful of my romance/love story novel choices. I applaud the authors for tackling this and hope more Christian women will read this book instead. 5 stars.

Monday, November 10, 2014

Let's have some fun...

I have a few ideas roaming around in my head right now for some blog topics...but I wanted to take a break from the usual marriage talk and just have some fun and type and talk to my readers.  How are you?  Leave me a comment if you are reading this and tell me where you are from :) Tell me a random fact about yourself...I am from a small town in South Louisiana, about an hour away from New Orleans. And I love tomato sauce, salsa, ketchup, etc...But I hate the taste of raw tomatoes :)

In almost 15 years that K and I have been together, we have had some really funny and fun memories. I am a picture and scrapbookaholic, so I have lots of pictures to look back on.  I am going to post a few and tell you what was going on at the time...I want you to have more insight into this crazy, blessed union that God has brought together.


Taking serious pictures are not in K's vocabulary. He loves to make sure we have goofy pictures on hand. Which describes his personalty...he is a goofball. He loves to have fun and loves to make people laugh, especially me.  He always knows how to make me smile. It's one of the many many things I love about him.



Finally graduating college was such a huge accomplishment for me. I had to sit out for 3 years, got a full time job and when K and I got married he knew I wanted to go back to finish. He made sure I did and I was able to stop working to work hard my final semester and focus completely on school.  My final semester had the best grades I ever made!  I was beyond blessed to have his support and help.  


K and I love to travel and try to take a vacation once a year to somewhere we love. We have been to the Gatlinburg/Pigeon Forge area three times (once for our honeymoon) and in 2010 we were able to make a trip to Disney World.  K and I are big kids...I love everything Disney and being able to go to Disney World together as a couple was amazing!!  We had so much fun and at times it was stressful and busy, but it was so worth it. Having fun as a couple is so very important. It helps relieve stress and strengthens your marriage.  Make sure to laugh together everyday!  Make it a challenge! ...see I can't go one blog without trying to help :)


This picture was actually done on our last vacation to Gatlinburg last Dec. It was so much fun. There was a lot of these little Old Time picture places around, but where we did this one, the guy who took our pictures was really funny and nice and made it so much fun. 


We love to have fun with not only each other, but those around us, especially our nieces and nephews. They definitely keep us smiling and laughing. 

Well, that is a little insight into who we are as a couple. Have a great day!




Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Compromise and say you're sorry...

I have been asked if K and I have problems...if we fight. At first, I was kind of surprised by the question and have responded that we are like every normal couple. We argue...we have issues. Both of us are very stubborn and have different ways of handling problems. But in some ways, we don't handle our conflicts normally, and that is when I realized we are different. And I came to the conclusion that is why we are happy and have fun together, and it may seem like we don't argue. I want to share with you what works for us and I hope it helps you.

When K and I bought our house we currently live in 3 years ago, I was so excited to decorate and buy new furniture. K had different feelings...he felt what we had was enough and didn't want to spend a bunch of money on decorations. We had many arguments on where certain things should go and what should or shouldn't be bought. After many fights, I finally sat him down and told him this was ridiculous. We had to stop it and come to a compromise. It was so stupid that we were spending such an exciting time fighting over where something should go. We still have had some stupid fights since then, but just the fact that I sat him down and didn't fight with him or nag him made such a difference. My first tip would be to learn the art of compromise. This has saved K and I from some serious fights. This also goes along with learning to pick your battles. The other day I got mad at K for something so stupid (it was about buying wooden spoons for my nephew, who loves playing with cooking spoons. After being very upset with K and I sat there pouting, I thought this is one of the most stupid disagreements! It actually inspired this post!) If it's a serious issue and needs to be addressed, then talk to him and find a common ground. But, if it's over something stupid...laugh and walk over to them and give them a hug. That will stop a fight dead in it's tracks. Laughter truly is the best medicine. The next time you and your significant other is fighting, seriously think and ask yourself if it is really worth fighting over?


 When I get mad or I feel conflict and confrontation rising...I shut down. I get quiet and won't say anything because I don't want to "fly off the handle" and say something I will regret. I try to practice Proverbs 15:1 in every situation. In some relationships, shutting down maybe a good thing, but in marriage communication is so necessary. One approach I take with K is if he has said something that has made me angry, I shut my mouth and breathe. (Counting to 10, 20, 100 may help). Men are "fix its" by nature...they need to know what is wrong so they can fix it and make it better. As their wives, I think it is important to honor that nature by telling them what is wrong, but they need to let us breathe and calm down first. With this verse in mind I also want to challenge you loud talkers...The next argument you are having with your spouse, try to not yell at them. Speaking in a loud voice will not get across to them any better than a soft answer would. K had to break me of that very early on. I raised my voice to him because that was the only way I knew to fight. He stopped me and said he wasn't raised like that and we would talk like two adults. He could hear me just as good without yelling. He said yelling at him would not get my point across any better, in fact, it made him shut down even more. Ever since then, we refuse to yell. It is very degrading. Also, this is a Biggie...absolutely no name calling!! That should be a rule between you two and should not be allowed. In almost 15 years, I have never called K anything but an endearment.

Be the first to say your sorry even if you don't want to. This will change the tone of the argument and will help them not be afraid to say they are sorry. And one final tip that has helped K and I tremendously...let go of your anger. Don't be mad at each other for long...I know couples who have stayed mad at each other over things for years and something that happened long ago...let it go. Forgive them and move on. It sounds cliche, but life really is too short to hold on to something. You learn from it and move on. If it is something they keep doing, address what it is and let them know it bothers you. Open the lines of communication. K and I have a very happy marriage because we talk to each other and we remember to have fun together. We laugh when we do something stupid and we forgive each other. We pick our battles. There are somethings he does that drives me bananas and vice versa, but we are in this together and love each other. That is more important.


Thursday, October 16, 2014

Real love VS Hollywood romance

I love Sheila Wray Gregoire's blog, To Love, Honor, and Vacuum, which is also about marriage. I get lots of great Christian marriage advice and ideas from her. She also has some great books I want to read and isn't afraid to tackle rough topics and some that are considered taboo (sex, porn, etc).
I came across a blog post from her about the 50 most romantic movies from her Facebook readers and it gave me a great idea...I wanted to express my opinion about the difference with Hollywood's depiction of love and what real love should be.

Don't get me wrong...I am a sucker for a good romance. I have read every Nicholas Sparks book and I love a good cheesy romantic chick flick. But...Hollywood has it so wrong. Most of the classic love stories are about a guy and girl who meet and only after first seeing each other...they fall head over heels in love. Then there is a major conflict like a previous love, dark past, bad childhood, parents, that prevents them from being together. Most of the time, the endings are happy. And who doesn't want to sit through the 2 hours heartache and falling in love with these characters and not see them end up together?

The problem with Hollywood's idea of love is that isn't real love. We never see what happens after with the couple. I know most of these romances are supposed to be "feel good" stories, because that's what they do: make us feel good about what we just witnessed. The problem is many people have the idea that is how our relationship is supposed to be, or it gets us wondering "why isn't my husband more like this character? He's so romantic." What we never see is the real love stories. Couples that have stayed together and been married many years and experienced every up and down that life can throw at them. That my readers...is real love. And I don't even want to get started on how Hollywood has depicted "making love". Yet...that will be another series for another day...

So...stealing an idea from my sister who has an awesome blog, I will be reviewing romantic movies and books from time to time and how it relates to the real world. Sometimes it will be my favorite book or movie, other times it maybe one I stumble upon.

I will start with my favorite movie and the #1 from Sheila's Facebook fans...


This is such an amazing love story. Like I have said, I have read all of Nicholas Sparks' books and will give them their own reviews. For me, the movie was better than the book. Not often that happens. I feel this story was a little more true to life.

 In the beginning, an older man starts reading to an older woman in what seems to be an assisted living home of sorts and we are taken to a remarkable love story set in the 40s. Noah and Allie fall in love at a young age and are faced with not only the obstacle of class, but Allie's parents. They try to ignore the obstacles, but it ultimately tears them apart and 7 years pass and Allie has moved on and met someone else, but Noah hasn't. The movie cuts from scenes of the older man and woman and back to the story in the notebook, which becomes torture for the viewers as we want to see what happens with Noah and Allie and who she will ultimately choose. 

This is a beautiful love story of not only love that lasts a lifetime, but a love that proves even through a horrible disease, it stands by each other. It also proved that opposites really do attract and you can learn to do fun things together and accept differences. I think Noah is a perfect depiction of a man and is romantic but not overly done. Allie can be overly spoiled, but she's rich and it's a bit expected. Overall, I think this is one of if not the best love story of all times. The ending itself is the best ending ever in both the book and movie and both are different.

My rating system will be 1 to 5 stars 1 being the worst 5 being the best. I would definitely give The Notebook 5 stars. I would watch it with your significant other at least once. I wouldn't recommend watching with children; however, because of some mature themes like sex and very mild violence.



Monday, October 6, 2014

Good times and bad...

I can honestly say that this past week and a half has been one of the hardest weeks my family has ever been through. As a married couple, it has also been one of the hardest years we have been through. We lost 2 of K's uncles within 2 weeks of each other early this year, plus K's surgery, and this week my step-dad passed away. Death is hard to deal with but this was the first time it was this close to our family. I have a young family. It's really hard to know how to deal with it.

But...I am one of five siblings and we all rallied together and pulled together to support my mom.

I think one of the most important things as a couple that we did was we relied on each other. Instead of giving in to the stress and being completely overloaded, K and I are leaning on each other and it has helped me so much. We are getting through it and helping my family make it through. I am one who lashes out at others, but I didn't. I think I talked about this before in my firsts post...but it really is so important to lean on each other through rough times. It tests your relationship, but what you do with the tests is what makes a marriage strong.

One other very important thing K and I have done through this rough year is lean on our Father in heaven. He gives you strength when you need it most and he is strengthening our marriage through it. Pray pray pray for strength.


One last piece of advice...
Treasure the stolen moments of comfort from each other. When you need a hug, don't be afraid to ask for it. Let him wrap his arms around you and relish in it. Cry on his shoulder. In times of grief, a lot of couples grow apart because they push their loved ones away...let God strengthen your relationship and don't be afraid to need them. That's a huge part of this journey together.


Wednesday, September 17, 2014

The best marriage advice comes from...

I had every intention to deliver the last part of my money series last week...even started a draft and prayed about where to go with it...and I became stuck. So after reading a great blog post on bible verses for marriage...I decided I would post my favorite and go to bible verses for marriage.

In the post I read, she asked the question what is marriage to you? How do I view marriage? While K and I were dating, a coworker at the grocery store I was working at the time got into a discussion with me about marriage. He asked me why in the world would I want to get married? My response: because I loved K and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. Why wouldn't I want to get married? The world's view of marriage is fairy tales or misery. What I have learned so far is that marriage is hard work. I get up each day and thank God for blessing me with a wonderful man that knows how to love me, but also how to treat me. He appreciates me. But, our marriage consists of three people: God, K, and I. I view marriage as a partnership between all three of us. I have an amazing marriage because we trust God. So here are the verses that have meant the most to me in our marriage...

1) 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NLT)) Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand it's own way. It is not irritable, it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

K and I had this verse read at our wedding and is one of my favorite bible verses. This paints a beautiful picture of how love should be between two people who spend their lives together. We choose to love our spouses for the rest of our lives...why not make it as beautiful as the bible teaches?

2) Ephesians 5: 22-23 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the Church; and He is the Savior of the body. (NKJV) 

As I continue my walk with the Lord and I learn more and more about how to be a good wife, I have learned how important this verse is. In my last post I talked about how important it is for the man to be the provider and touched on wives submitting to their husbands. As hard as this is...it is so important to follow this advice. It does not mean we are weak or that we are not equals. Marriage takes teamwork, but we are to submit to our husbands and not withhold from him. 

3)Proverbs 19:22 The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord.

In the simplest terms...marriage is a gift from God. The more we view marriage as a gift and the fact that God has blessed us with our spouse, the more we see them as a gift.

4) Proverbs 15:1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. 

I think this verse is so important for a couple. Memorize it. When you are fighting, repeat this verse in your head. It may not always work, but it helps me to stop from saying something I might regret.

5) Proverbs 31: 10-13: Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. (NKJV)

I think this verse speaks for itself on the beautiful picture of how a wife should be. There has only been one perfect person, Jesus, and we are not perfect. But these are great guidelines of how to achieve an amazing marriage. The bible is full of great advice for married couples :)

Saturday, September 6, 2014

Show me the money- Part 3

Before I get into the meat of this post...I wanted to say that K is recovering nicely and has returned to work and seems to be feeling better. We even had a date night last night that was long long overdue.

This post I have been sitting on for awhile because it is very important to me and something that is lost to our society. I know that not everything that works for K and I will work for others, but it is an old concept that has worked. Marriage is the image of God. The wife represents God's sensitive side, while the husband represents the leadership side.

But there is one thing I want you to know: The head of every man is Christ, the head of every woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. 1Corinthians 11:3 (NLT)

In our marriage, K is our provider. I believe in the traditional role of the husband to be the leader and the head of the house. This is a hard concept and I feel I need to put a bit of a disclaimer...if a woman wants to work, by all means I am all for it. I have a job. However, the husband being the head provider achieves the need wives have for security. Before K and I bought our house, he made sure that his income alone could cover the bills. My income is extra and a blessing. I firmly believe that a marriage is teamwork and a partnership and the husband being the "leader" does not make him better and does not give him permission to be controlling. We as wives have just as much say as he does. But, God does instruct us to submit to our husbands and support him when he makes a decision. It's hard and because of our nature we have a tendency to want to fight and think we are right and it should be done our way. Wives hear me on this...make your voice heard but trust your husband and support him in his decisions for our families. It will save you lots of arguments.

And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the Church." Ephesians 5:21-23

If you are blessed like I am that your husband is able to be the provider (I know different situations arise to prevent this like sickness, surgeries, debt, choices etc if you do work full time I am definitely not saying I am better or your way of living is wrong) there should be some shouldering of our responsibilities as wives. For 4 wonderful years, I was able to stay home; however, with the understanding that I took on the role of everything in our house. I kept the house clean, did the laundry, grocery shopping, made sure K had supper when he got home, the works. He didn't have to worry about anything. Not because he expected me to or I had to...but because I appreciate him getting up every morning and making sure we are safe, secure, and provided for. I believe he shouldn't have to come home and worry about those things especially if I am home! This is something we also decided together.
Now that I am working, I still handle a lot of these things because I work part time, but if I am busy and swamped with kid projects or responsibilities, I am not afraid to ask him to shoulder some of the weight. That is why we are a team. If I cook, he cleans the kitchen. If I do the laundry, he helps fold, pick it up, and put the sheets back on the bed. Lean on each other when you have a lot of worries.

I know this post is a harder one to swallow. I am a traditionalist and it's harder in our society to have this belief. But I also think there is something to say that so many marriages fail because of lack of biblical principles, teamwork, and submission.





Monday, September 1, 2014

Still Experiencing Firsts

Sorry for the momentary absence and I will definitely get back to the money series I was doing, but K and I experienced a first together. In our whole 14 1/2 years together, we have experienced a lot of firsts. I was his first girlfriend, first date, first love, pretty much first everything.

This past week we had our first experience with surgery. K had been battling with problems with his stomach. He spent a few weeks going to different doctors and going through different tests before learning he needed his gall bladder out. The only other surgery he had was knee surgery his senior year in high school and we were only friends at the time. He went ahead scheduled the surgery and scheduled his time off from work.

I wasn't really nervous about the surgery, I knew God would take care of him. The scariest part was when I was taken to the back to see him, he had gotten really weak and pale when they put the I.V. in. I learned something new about him...he does not like needles. Not many people do...me included...but it made him so nervous. The surgery went well and we did have to stay overnight, which was a whole new experience in itself.

One of the biggest things I have learned with this experience is how much we need each other. We take care of each other when we are sick, but this has been different. He can't bend or lift so I have been doing everything. And I am saying that with a smile. It's stressful at times...I have him relying on me plus my job is about to start this week so we had certain preparations to make for it, but he needs me. It's an amazing feeling.

The way I deal with pressure is to make sure to embark in sometime to myself. Even if it's only 15 mins. Those of you with children, I know you experience pressure on a daily basis. You not only have the responsibilities as a wife, but you are also a mother, and when your children are sick you have that added to your load. Remember to take a couple mins to breathe. Right now, K is resting, so I am taking advantage of the time to myself and spent sometime with the Lord and I am posting this blog. A little later, I will go to the gym.

So my advice today is no matter what kind of first you experience together...it's a first. Lean on each other because you need one another. Also...when there is added responsibilities and stress, take a few mins to yourself to breathe. For me it's a hot bath, a quick workout, reading a couple pages of a good book. Take advantage of given moments. Until next time...

Friday, August 15, 2014

Show Me the Money- Part 2

Part of our homework for our financial peace class is to sit down and call a budget committee meeting (which is the two of us together) to discuss the budget and where every dollar is going to go.  The first time K and I sat down to do our homework, he wanted me to do it. Although I am not great with money or math, I was a little excited because I love the idea of giving every dollar an assignment so we know where it is going. How many times before had we sat there wondering where our spending money went??  So I started filling out every blank and talked over with him what amount was going to go where.  After I was done I showed it to him and he pointed out a few areas that I had missed.  I asked him with my head in my hands...how did you do this every two weeks??  I have a real appreciation for the detail and patience he has had with our budget and money. This exercise has helped me realize how hard he has worked to keep us from getting in serious financial trouble.

As I said in the previous post, K is definitely a saver, and I am definitely a spender. This has caused conflict in the past several times. I will admit...I can act very spoiled sometimes when I don't get what I want. I will bother him and ask him about something I want until he would give in. I am cringing just thinking of that attitude. The exercises we have been practicing with Dave Ramsey's class has brought my attitude to my attention full force. I have read Proverbs 31:10-12 several times but this verse popped into my head as I was typing this. That kind of attitude is not the picture of this wife.  

"Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? 
She is more precious than rubies.
Her husband can trust her,
and she will greatly enrich his life,
She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life." (NLT)

 Where once I would have completely just bought something on impulse or bugged him until I got what I wanted now I think about the full cost and outcome of what I really want and I ask myself can I wait for it. I am learning that saving is not bad, in fact...it's necessary. It helps prepare for situations that may arise and you don't have to wonder where you will get the money to pay for the tire that just blew out or the washer stopped working or the deductible that has to be paid because of a medical emergency that is happening. K has been a saver since the beginning and it drove me nuts when we were dating because by the time we reached our 6th year together...I was ready for the next step. I had BEEN ready. What I didn't know was that one of the reasons he took so long was because he wanted to make sure he had enough money saved to not only pay for the beautiful ring he gave me, but also for us to have a beautiful small wedding with our immediate family and have a great honeymoon. (He didn't finance any of this.) This mindset he has spilled into our married life and has kept us from real financial problems. Yes, we struggled and have had to wait for big things we have wanted, but it was worth it.

"A prudent person foresees danger and takes precautions.
The simpleton goes blindly on and suffers consequences." (Proverbs 27:12)

So with all these little stories about K and I's money personalities...here's my advice today:

1) Start saving and put aside an emergency fund (this is one of Dave Ramsey's biggest tips.) Prepare for the unknown and discuss what you think is emergencies. This will save conflict, fights, and stress when these situations arise.

2) Determine where you can cut and save to put in the emergency fund. Where was our biggest place we were overspending? Eating Out. We have budgeted to eat out twice a week and sometimes try to cut that down to only once a week. Which is so much better than we were doing.

3) Before making a purchase, first determine if you need it or want it. For big purchases, try to buy it only if you can pay for it in cash. If not, save for that particular item. Yes, you have to wait longer, but it is worth it. All of our furniture, vacations, electronics, have been paid for with money we had diligently saved in our account.  Not financed or put on credit cards.  It saves you from unwanted debt and interest rates that are absolutely ridiculous!!

4) Don't be afraid to shop generic products. Name brand products will charge you several dollars more just because of the name!

5) Another area we would overspend is groceries. A couple of tips that have helped me recently:
     a) Have a budget of how much you will spend grocery shopping
     b) Write your list and as you put in your buggy write on the side of the item how much it costs. It will definitely keep you from overspending and putting more in your buggy than you need
     c) Coupons help and are good, but only cut the coupons that you need and that are on your list
     d) Try to plan what you need around what's on sale. If you have to go to more than one place, sometimes it really is worth it. Example: Walmart's price of Sparkle towels was 5.97.  Dollar General had them on sale for $4! That saved me 1.97!

It may take extra planning and time to sit down and plan your grocery run or budget with your spouse...but it's worth it.  And it may not all come together right away...but it will in the long run.  Don't give up and rely on each other and be open to each other's different way of thinking. It will save you lots of arguments and conflict in the future.



Friday, August 8, 2014

Show me the money Part 1

So how are you doing with your challenge to do something nice for your significant other?  The last couple days have been a little harder since K is out of town, but he is coming home today and I can't wait to see him and spend time with him. He doesn't go out of town often, but when he does, I miss him like crazy.  I am very blessed that K works a job that he is home every night and weekend.  You wives out there that have husbands that have to be away for weeks and months...my heart goes out to you and my prayers are with you.  You women rock!!

So let's talk about a topic that tends to be one of the biggest conflicts in a marriage...Money.  Since K and I got married, K has handled our money. Which from what I have observed is opposite of how it usually is. I have seen that a lot of the wives take care of the checkbook and balancing, right? Since K works at a bank and has for the past 12 years, he is naturally good with money and budgeting.  I am not.  I am a spender by nature and only worried about how much spending money we had in our account. K writes everything down in a little notebook and how much goes where, but I will be honest...I would skim the numbers and check the bottom to see how much spending we had and I was good to go. I was not involved. We have had some disagreements about money mainly because K is a saver and our two different personalities would clash.


Where there is no counsel, the people will fall; 
But in the multitude of counselors there is safety. Proverbs 11:14

A few weeks ago we saw in our bulletin from church that they were offering a class on Dave Ramsey's financial peace university. K thought it would be interesting to enroll to hear biblical principles about money. I agreed. I am so glad we have started this class. We were already on a budget in a way, but this class has definitely put us on a stricter budget. One of Dave's principles that I love is that you tell your money where to go and give it an assignment (every dollar!!) instead of wondering where it went. K and I's biggest problem was that we would overspend on eating out and if there was something we wanted, we would buy it. Even though he would write all our budget down at the beginning of the month, it was kind of forgotten and we wouldn't keep track of how much spending we had left. I think a lot of problems with money conflicts is the feeling of insecurity when the money starts running out and the panic of wondering what will happen next. The priorities of money are out of whack and results in big fights and lots of bad consequences like no savings or worse, bankruptcy.

So here is a few tips we have learned from Dave that we have put to practice:

1) Do the budget together.

2) Give every dollar you make an assignment

3) Make sure to prioritize your budget (our priorities include: Tithing, Bills, Savings, Spending) and be as detailed as possible. Include gas, groceries, etc and write each debt like credit cards, student loans, etc.

4) Allow yourselves some spending money and do this with cash!! Once the cash is gone, no more spending money and it prevents you from overspending!  It works!

The plans of the diligent lead surely to plenty, 
But those of everyone who is hasty, surely to poverty. Proverbs 21: 5

My next post will be about savings (what has worked for us and some of Dave's tips) and I am currently in research mode on how to save on groceries. That was another area K and I would overspend. I do coupon a little, but I think I will have to change my methods. Until next time!


Friday, August 1, 2014

The little things really do count...

Every day life can become so...ordinary and routine.  We get caught in our hustle and bustle of work life, laundry, bills, kids, responsibilities that I seem to lose myself in it.  While I am on break from the school right now, I have fallen into wife duties.  I have taken over making sure the house is clean, laundry is done, supper is cooked, and groceries are in the pantry.  I have hobbies that keep me busy when I am not doing that (I plan to get lost in a book very shortly) as well as nephews and family who I love to spend time with...K and I have also fallen into routine and ordinary as of late. This morning I came across a pin on Pinterest that said 52 Text Message Bombs to send him...  of course God knew just what I needed to see and I thought...when was the last time I did something unexpected for K?  Something that wasn't normal and also showed that I loved him? I do my "wife duties" (as I lovingly refer to them) not because he expects me to do them...but because I appreciate what he does for me by working hard and providing a life for us.  But, when we are caught in the everyday swing of life, I forget to tell him how much I appreciate him. Sometimes I forget to show him.

So I am challenging myself to do a little something every day to remind him that I love him and appreciate what he does.  When K left in May for two weeks for a banking school, he left me little notes in hidden places to remind me that he loves me. I still have a few of them out today.  That meant more to me than he knows!  After reading the pin about the texts, I sent K a text message just to let him know I was thinking about him and that I loved him. Sometimes it's the little things and things out of the ordinary that mean the most to us.  I challenge you to do this with me for our spouses...here are some ideas:

1) Send your spouse a loving text...whether it is just to say hi, you are thinking about them or make it a sexy one (K's phone is tied to work...so unfortunately...I can't do this one ;) )

2) Cook their favorite dinner or dessert for them unexpectedly when they come home from work

3) If there is something they always do chore wise, do it for them without saying anything. (like taking out the garbage.  I expect K to do this, but I know this one would be a good one to practice)

4) If they are readers...insert a little note into the book they are reading to make them smile (or IPad, Kindle etc)

5) Do you pack their lunch for work?  Put a little note in their lunch kit. Bring a smile to their face while they are working

6) If you know there is something they have been wanting and have been putting off buying it, buy it for them and don't tell them

7) The next time you go to a movie together, let the other one pick what they have been wanting to see or a restaurant they have been wanting to eat at

8) Wear an outfit you know they love

9) Think of things that you are so thankful for that they do.  Make sure to tell them

10) Let them pick a t.v. show to watch the next time you watch t.v. together (even if you don't really want to see it)

11) Give them some type of affection (never underestimate the power of a hug) that lasts longer than a couple seconds

12) This is kind of cheesy but cute...pick up a bag of lifesavers for them to take to work and put a note that says "You are my lifesaver" (cute, right?)

13) Surprise them with lunch one day or an invite for a impromptu lunch

14) If your spouse cooks dinner, clean the kitchen for them (there is really nothing sexier than my husband cleaning the kitchen after I have cooked dinner. That to me is heaven!)

15) Compliments!! If you like something they are wearing, make sure to tell them

16) Ask them if there is anything that you can do for them to take some stress away (pay a bill that is out of the way, make a phone call they have been needing to make, a massage, etc)

Now of course I have a kicker to this challenge.  I want us to do this for the next month.  The whole month of August.  I am hoping it becomes natural to us and it won't be a challenge anymore. It's always a good idea to do something out of the ordinary, especially in our marriages!  But the kicker will be...even if you aren't happy with your spouse and you don't think they deserve something nice or unexpected...that is when they will need it the most.  So I encourage and urge you to still go about the challenge in the midst of a fight. I plan to follow this kicker myself ;)  And feel free to think of your own ideas to show your love and appreciation and if you have one I didn't post, feel free to comment!


Thursday, July 24, 2014

The answer is...No

I have been asked a certain question that I have had to use that answer so many times. At family weddings, funerals, get togethers...and the answer has remained the same. K and I don't have children. By choice. I know...with that being said, those of you who have children are probably thinking "oh it's easy for you to say you can have a happy marriage. You don't have kids". I've heard it. Although I may not have experienced the struggles you go through when you have children and what it does to a marriage...I have seen it. I have 5 nephews and 3 nieces and have witnessed what can happen. Please understand I am not saying children bring horror to a marriage or are bad for it. But, I am sure that those of you who are married with kids would agree with me when I say that they change a marriage.  I am not saying good or bad...it just changes the way things were from before.
Let me quickly say I love children. They are the sweetest of blessings. K and I spoil our nieces and nephews rotten and love spending time with them. I also work part time during the school year at a children's day out program with 2 year olds. I really feel like God has wanted me to work with young children and be a good example to them. For the same reason I wanted to do this blog, I feel children need guidance and examples to follow that will help guide them in the right direction. there are so many horrible role models out there!  
I take my role as an example to these little ones very seriously. If they can have sense of normalcy that they don't get at home, I have accomplished something good.
And that is one reason why K I have not had children yet. I feel our attention and devotion would not be as strong if we had our own. I also am not quite ready for the responsibility. I have gotten many looks and words when I have said we are not ready:
"You are never really ready"
The you hate children look
"You have such a clean house...oh wait...you don't have kids"
"Your biological clock is ticking"
"You don't know what you are missing"
And my favorite..."Wait until you have kids, then you will understand"

All valid points. I have never experienced motherhood and I know that is a special bond and something I will never truly understand until I go through it. Maybe one day God will change my heart, but for now I am simply not ready.
I have wondered if waiting to have a baby is what God wants. I don't think he would want us to make a decision if we are not ready and the only thing I could find in the bible is Isaiah 54:1 "Sing O childless woman, you who have never given birth! Break into loud and joyful song, O Jerusalem, you who have never been in labor. For the desolate woman now has more children than the woman who lives with her husband, says the Lord"
It was meant for Jerusalem, but at the time a woman who could not have children was looked down upon and it was shameful. After reading the commentary I understood that we are to praise God no matter what we are struggling through and it is in his hands. And I believe God has given me a job and little ones in my life to influence until he is ready to help us have our own.

Friday, July 18, 2014

Date Nights Part 2

 



I knew I would spend time on a few posts about dating because like I have said before, it is so crucial to a marriage. The misconception is now that you are married and you are together, the dating stops.  It should never stop!  Dating helps keep that fire lit and it also helps you have fun together and remember why you love each other.  This post will focus on fun ideas to do together while being reasonably cheap.  Give them a try!  I am going to challenge K and I to also try them. 

Before I get into the ideas, I promised I would have the story of K and I's first kiss. (it's really fun to travel down memory lane...on a night when there isn't anything on T.V...pull out your wedding album or old pictures of the two of you and laugh at how much you have changed!).

K had asked me to his prom and his military ball (he was in the JROTC at his high school).  The prom was first and on April 1, 2000 I wore a very pretty light blue sequenced dress, rode in a black limo with another couple and ate at an expensive Italian restaurant everyone else seemed to pick for their prom night. We went to the dance, but I think we danced to one song (the music wasn't that great) and after went to a friend's house to watch a couple movies before our curfews.  K drove me to my house and walked me to the door.  He gave me a hug and said good night then started walking back to his car.  I was thinking...that's it?  I go to a dance with him and not even a kiss goodnight?  I knew I really liked him and he was extremely shy...so I figured I would take matters into my own hands.  He was about to get in his car so I took a deep breath walked to him and just planted one.  After a few precious seconds, he looked at me and smiled and said "Thank you."  Then we went our separate ways. (I do not let him live it down that I kissed him first) Of course, a week later we made it official we were a couple at his military ball.

Here are some cheap at home date night ideas (for nights you can't get a sitter, can't get out, or just want to stay home etc):
1) Cook a favorite meal together
2)Play cards (go fish, rummy, UNO, anything)
3) Play board games (K and I had a fun game of scrabble the other night)
       (also fun to play: scattergories, monopoly, scene it, checkers, guess who, jenga)
4) If you are gamers...play a co-op game together (K and I love to play Lego games together. We do not quit until we have found everything! We will also do dance central together which is a lot of fun)
5) Watch funny you tube videos together
6) Ask a series of random questions (if you had a million dollars how would you spend it?  What is your favorite childhood Christmas? if you could be any character from fiction, who would you be?)
7) Read a book together
8) If you like the outdoors, bring your date outside and have a picnic on your patio. (I am not outdoorsy...I worry about things like bugs)
9) Do yard work together
10) Build a fort and watch a movie (I really want to try this one. I can see K loving this idea...he's a big kid at heart)
11) Saw this on pinterest: buy two Nerf guns and set one by the front door. When he gets home from work, hide somewhere in your house and be armed. Let the fun begin!
12) Go through old pictures together from childhood, your relationship, etc. Spend the entire evening reminiscing about the good ole days...

Here are some date ideas when you get out of the house:
1)Go to a flea market
2) Attend a local festival
3) Take selfies around town in different spots (make sure some of them are goofy)
4) Go bowling
5) Go listen to a local band you have never heard of
6)Karaoke contest
7) Putt Putt Golf
8) Go to a favorite restaurant, each order something completely different and share the food

Don't be afraid to try something different together. Sometimes those create the best memories!

Monday, July 14, 2014

Technology these days...

I tried an experiment on Saturday that half worked and I think I will be trying again.  I am too connected. Do you ever feel that way?  I misplace my cell phone sometimes and think what did I do 10 years ago before cell phones became such a necessity?  I spend a lot of time on my phone.  Whether it's checking email, facebook, or pinterest, responding to texts, answering phone calls...it's always right there by me.

Since K and I were going to spend Saturday together, I was going to try something. I have noticed that when we are watching T.V. together or out together, I will use my phone. I have gotten better about it, but it's still always there to distract me. So, Saturday morning I turned it on silent and kept it in my room with occasionally checking it to make sure no one had called or texted.  The experiment was to stay off it completely.  Well, I was able to stay completely off anything social media. And I think I will do this more often!  There was a lot of freedom to it!  Try it if you can!  Especially if you are on a date with your hubby. He's not as connected as I am...he hasn't checked his facebook in 2 years and he definitely doesn't use Pinterest. But, it made for a very nice date. We ate at one of our favorite sushi restaurants and the food was so yummy. 

Later on, I answered a couple phone calls and a text and we had our first sleepover with one of my youngest nephews.  He is almost 1.  He is so funny and very mobile crawling and pulling himself up to stand where he sees the opportunity.  He made us laugh alot.

 
K and I are also trying no t.v. two nights a week. We watch a lot of t.v. Especially in the fall. And so far it's going well.  And we are starting a bible study on Wed nights so that will help the experiment even more.  I want us to talk more and of course...have fun together.  So we'll see how it goes.
 
So my advice for today is unplug once in a while.  From whatever electronic device is distracting you.  Technology is great and I love it, but sometimes it's good to disconnect for a while and focus on something else.

Friday, July 11, 2014

Date nights...

Do you remember your first date with your significant other? Let's jump into a time machine and go back to Feb. 3, 2000. Well, before we get there we have to make a few stops. K and I were in our senior year of high school. He went to public school...I was in private. We met at our local grocery store and he bagged the groceries; I was the cashier. My first day on my first job...I was super nervous and didn't know anyone. This cute guy walks up to my register, starts bagging my groceries and introduces himself. I remember thinking...he's really cute. Of course, at the time I had a boyfriend. Who lived 6 hours away at college. I later found out from a fellow employee that K thought I had a beautiful smile. But...being the faithful girlfriend that I was (unlike the boyfriend I later learned) I became good friends with K. The kind of friend that would laugh and joke together and vent a little about the way the boyfriend treated me. All the while...K and I kept it platonic. Until almost a year later and the boyfriend and I broke up because he was seeing someone else and had been for awhile. K waited one month. Then he asked me out on his first official date. EVER. We went to the movies to see Scream 3...at the time I was a horror movie fan.

And now I can't stomach all the blood and guts. K had never even seen any of the scream movies. He was just happy I went out with him.

Do you remember the way you felt on your first date? The excitement and fun...your stomach in knots...I know mine was. I think dating is absolutely necessary in a relationship no matter how long you have been together.It keeps the relationship alive and you get to do fun things together.  Fun is such an important key with your significant other.

Here are some pointers...dress up, put your favorite outfit on and some makeup and go to your favorite restaurant. Sit and talk about things no one else would care about. Make sure to laugh. Now the kicker...do this once a week. Those of you who have children, I know that is a harder one...here are some suggestions. Put your kids to bed early and have some ice cream and a movie. If you can't make it through a whole movie, watch a favorite T.V. show. Netflix is great for that. Or get a babysitter if you can. Your marriage is worth it. Sometimes it's hard to figure out what to do...that will be a post for another day along with the story of our first kiss...

Thursday, July 10, 2014

In the beginning...

I have been having it on my mind for a while now to start a marriage blog. I knew what that might mean...getting downright personal and blunt. Let me start by saying that I am a Christian and follow biblical principles. So that may turn some of you...ok...many of you away. And I have accepted that. But for those of you that stick around...I hope I help you. Marriages today are looked at as a joke. Our generation and the one following does not know what it means to work at a marriage...stick to it until "death do you part". Yes...that is a part of the vows. I mean...we have Kim Kardashian as a role model. Something is seriously wrong with our society.

So what do I hope to accomplish with this blog? To speak to you and tell you that there is hope. Marriages are not miserable or all fighting and struggles. You can be happy and have fun together.What do I have to back that up? After 8 years of dating and 6 years married, we are each other's best friends. We have our issues and it is far from perfect, but we work through it because of one person...Jesus Christ. He is our counselor and savior. And with him, we have achieved so much.

I will talk about everything from personal experiences like our wedding, stupid fights, being a housewife, managing time, dating each other (so crucial!!) and even sex. But don't worry...I won't get too personal with that one. Some things have to stay between us. And even if you aren't married and you are in a relationship, I am targeting you too. Bottom line, I wan to help through my own experiences, biblical principles, and laughter that love and marriage do go together. Like peas and carrots. Ok...that may have been a little lame :)